A Christmas Miracle on Nacoochee Road
Or . . . Why I will never sing the Chipmunks’ Christmas Song Again!
On many a night, when I lived in that hovel near Dahlonega, made famous by the History Channel, BBC and PBS, Woods Rats climbed into the V of my Explorer’s V6 engine and started building a nest. As soon as I cranked the engine in the morning, they would either be fried or else quickly jump ship. I would vacuum out the poop and pinestraw from the V and go on . . . with little harm being done.
Last week, as soon as the snow melted off the streets, I took off in my good ole Ford Explorer to buy groceries. I noticed that a section of the carpet in the back of the car. It was quickly evident that some of the pistons were not firing, but made it to the supermarket. On the way home I started smelling gasoline. When I got home, I saw gas running down the side of the engine and the V of the V6 was filled with wood chips and regurgitated fibers from the carpet in the back of the car. Chipmunks! I opened up the air intake to see if the filter was clogged. It was . . . by 23 pieces of my car’s wiring!
The tow truck driver said that it was a miracle that the Explorer didn’t blow up. The chipmunks had also bit into the fuel line. The dogs were in the car with me. We all would have been incinerated and from thence forward you wouldn’t get any new POOF news letters. However, I do admit that death by roasting would have been a far greater concern to me than not being able to write more newsletters. So I can count that non-incident as my bonified Christmas Miracle.
Now the bonified anti-miracle at Christmastime. The repairs will cost $1100 and the car has still not been worked on after eight days. The meter for my rental car is ticking merrily away. So I will be singing to Santa Clause, “All I want for Christmas is my fixed up car, my fixed up car, my fixed up car!” So I won’t be able to give all readers a box of gold, frankinsense and myrrh, as promised! Ho-ho-ho!
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